Tooth Fairy Note

The text of Kate's note is transcribed below.



Dear Tooth Fairy —

I lost my tooth, but I still want need deserve compensation. I will be ever grateful if you comply. Please respond to my legal counsel otherwise. Regards,

Kate

P.S. Please leave the rest of the teeth in my mouth alone.

What I'm Going to Do With My Summer Vacation

Dad: Tomorrow's the last day of school!

Kate: And then we get to spend time together.

Protein Clouds

Dad [while watching the complete downpour with Kate]: Do you think it rains when the clouds look down on us all day, get sad from what they see us do, and then cry?

[Kate blinks.]

Dad: Like tonight, when we didn't eat our green beans for dinner.

Kate: I don't need to eat all my green beans. I ate the chicken and that has the protein I need.

Dexterity Come and Gone

[Dad shows off his dexterity by flipping a stack of quarters off his elbow and catching them in mid-air.]

Mom [less impressed than her words indicate]: That's impressive. I remember when you had good coordination.

Jane's Ambition

Family on the Pier

Andy on the Bike - Video

Jane in a Tube

Andy at Soccer

As long as they are cheesy and crunchy

Jane [who is self-correcting the cute mispronunciations indicative of a budding toddler]: I want tackers. I want crackers.

Dad: Do you want "tackers" or "crackers?"

Jane [pauses]: I want goldfish.

How About Plan B?

Mom: I'm tired.

Jane: I'm tired.

Dad [to Jane]: How about you go upstairs, put your pajamas on, and mom can snuggle you to sleep?

Jane [pauses and stammers]: How 'bout...how 'bout I eat my pizza?

Ranking Intelligence

Dad: Do you love me because I'm the smartest?

Kate: You're not the smartest; Grandaddy is.

Dad: Why is that?

Kate [like fingernails on a chalkboard]: Because he knows more than his little boy.

Door Number One

Dad [carries Andy and Kate's school clothes for the day downstairs where Kate is waiting to get dressed]: I've got two sets of clothes here and I'll let you pick. You can either dress in girl clothes or Andy's clothes.

Kate [pauses for effect]: I like to dress in girl clothes, so I'll take "A."