False Advertising

While driving along on vacation reading the signs on the road.

Kate: Hooters? What's that?

Mom: I think it's a store that sells owl stuff.

Kate: Mom, don't be silly. It's obviously a restaurant owned by a man named Hooter.

Maximum Cuteness

Dad [following a particular cute response]: Lily, could you be any cuter?

Lily [thoughtfully]: Hmm, I don't think so.

Love Recipient

Jane [in a voice only a three-year-old can muster]: Dad, did you know I love you?

Dad: I do now.

Jane [flatly, picking up the stuffed horse next to her]: Did you know the horsey loves you, too?

Dad: That's news.

Back Off

Jane [apparently perturbed at being pushed around by siblings]: If they touch me one more time, I'm going to 'grrrr' at them.

Dad: "Grrrr?"

Jane: Grrrr

Genuine Prayers

While driving to church I was talking to Andy and Kate about fasting now that they've been baptized and the importance of picking something to pray about. [For them, fasting means skipping one meal and praying about something specific. Jane isn't old enough to participate yet.].

Mom: So what do you want to fast about today?

Andy: Being free. [Sounds reasonable].

Kate: The men who fight for our country. [Naturally.]

Jane: I'm gonna fast for candy.

Nothing Worth Hearing

Mom: You have to put on your hearing aides before school.

Andy: I don't want to hear people.

Note: Andy's hearing aides are blue and white swirled to show everyone he's a BYU fan. It's the only way I can convince him to wear them.

Submission

Lily [to Mom]: You're not the boss of me.

Mom: Oh yes I am. That's exactly what I am.

[Mom sits on Lily and tickles her mercilessly.]

Mom: Say I'm the biggest boss ever.

Lily: You're the biggest hot dog ever.