Accrual

Jane: You're the best dad ever.

Dad: Thanks!

J: And I really like you.

D: That's very nice. I like you, too.

J [pauses, then calculates]: If I say one more nice thing I get a candy, right?

Pop Culture

Overheard while Andy was in the bathroom drying his hair:

Andy: Oh yeah ... I'm like Bieber!

False Advertising

While driving along on vacation reading the signs on the road.

Kate: Hooters? What's that?

Mom: I think it's a store that sells owl stuff.

Kate: Mom, don't be silly. It's obviously a restaurant owned by a man named Hooter.

Maximum Cuteness

Dad [following a particular cute response]: Lily, could you be any cuter?

Lily [thoughtfully]: Hmm, I don't think so.

Love Recipient

Jane [in a voice only a three-year-old can muster]: Dad, did you know I love you?

Dad: I do now.

Jane [flatly, picking up the stuffed horse next to her]: Did you know the horsey loves you, too?

Dad: That's news.

Back Off

Jane [apparently perturbed at being pushed around by siblings]: If they touch me one more time, I'm going to 'grrrr' at them.

Dad: "Grrrr?"

Jane: Grrrr

Genuine Prayers

While driving to church I was talking to Andy and Kate about fasting now that they've been baptized and the importance of picking something to pray about. [For them, fasting means skipping one meal and praying about something specific. Jane isn't old enough to participate yet.].

Mom: So what do you want to fast about today?

Andy: Being free. [Sounds reasonable].

Kate: The men who fight for our country. [Naturally.]

Jane: I'm gonna fast for candy.